That Christmas Level You Can’t Unlock Again

As my kids have gotten a little older, I always have this fear that Christmas will not be the same for them like it was for me. I think most of us feel that way. Not because they will not get enough gifts or because the house will not be decorated, but because the feeling will be different. I would describe it as anticipation or maybe even slowness. As kids we had this sense that something special was coming and that it mattered.

What Made Christmas Feel Different as a Kid

When I slow down and really think about it, I know obviously it was not about the gifts. The memories that stick with me are small, quiet, and more of a feeling than an actual memory. Laying under the Christmas tree just staring at the lights. Waking up before everyone else because sleep was impossible. Those mornings felt so calm, and recognizing that as a kid really says something.

I mean let’s be honest the presents obviously mattered, of course, but they were not the only reason the day felt special. The feeling lived in everything surrounding them. The waiting. The buildup. The gifts were just one part of something bigger.

Christmas Felt Bigger Because Life Was Smaller

Christmas felt bigger when I was a kid, and for a long time I thought that meant it was better. Now I think it just felt bigger because life was smaller. If you really think about it in many ways the whole world was smaller and less connected. As kids, we obviously had fewer responsibilities, less bullshit to deal with, and fewer things competing for our attention. That simplicity created space.

There were not endless options for entertainment or noise pulling us in every direction. Even right now as I write this, I am playing Marvel Snap on my phone and I have a show on in the background. When you have fewer choices, you dive deeper into what is in front of you because it’s your only option. Our imagination had to fill the gaps. Christmas had room to grow because there was not much else crowding it out. We were waiting for that one new thing we had been wanting all year.

Kids are Not Bored Anymore

When I look at my kids, I see that they really do not experience boredom for too long. They have so many options that the second they are bored they move on to the next thing. That’s why TikTok became so popular so fast, it gives you quick bite sized videos that do not overstay their welcome. Boredom played a bigger role in our childhoods than I realized. We waited. We wondered. We sat with quiet moments instead of immediately filling them. When there was nothing to do, our minds did the work. We made up stories, games, and random shit up all the time. That boredom did not ruin the magic. Looking back, I think some of the excitement came from not being always entertained.

We Did Not Document Everything

We also did not document and save every thought we had. Okay, I am going to be honest here, I debated even putting this in because I bet you are all thinking “You dumbass, you are literally doing this right now.” Honestly, I don’t have a rebuttal so let’s move on lol.  Some of my favorite childhood memories have no pictures. There was no pressure to capture the perfect angle. The moments existed whether or not they were recorded.

Those memories live with so much detail in my mind, even without proof. I can remember certain things like literally down to the weather and smell. I can’t help but think if they stayed with me because they were never interrupted. They were allowed to exist, without being filtered, shared, or paused for the perfect shot.

There was also no rush. Christmas mornings felt long, not because they actually were because nothing was pulling us away from them. There were no emails we wanted to check, mobile games (I am still playing Marvel Snap while writing this), or social media. We were all just present.

We lingered a lot more because we were not in such a damn rush all the time.

You Activated a Trap Card

Look I get it, we want that for our kids. I hear friends and coworkers say all the time that they want their kids to feel how they did during Christmas. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking the old way was better. Nostalgia has a way of smoothing rough edges and leaving only the nice parts behind. But better is not the right word always, now I would say it was different. I do think it’s very unfortunate that the word different has such a negative connotation to it, that people automatically think it’s bad.

We are all going to grow up in a world shaped by new norms, new music, and new realities. Our kids are not missing out on our childhood. They are experiencing a version of it that reflects the world they live in. Comparing their experience to ours is not fair to them, they may not even want it. If anything, it only makes us more anxious and just another thing that we are trying to keep up with.

What Are We Really Trying to Recreate?

This is the question that keeps coming back to me. What am I actually trying to recreate? Is it Christmas itself, or is it the feeling of being young? The truth may be uncomfortable. I think a majority of people may not miss the holidays most. They miss the absence of responsibility and the feeling of being carefree. The feeling that someone else was carrying the weight of the world and all the bullshit for us. Honestly, I do not even know where I fall in that spectrum. Who knows, maybe it changes day to day.

A New Kind of Christmas Magic

Christmas can still be incredible without looking the way it used to. It just needs intention. Time that is protected from constant rushing. A few traditions that repeat every year, excluding matching Christmas pajamas that are worn all day. That needs to stop.

I am learning that part of parenting is letting go of the need to perfectly recreate your own past. I mean I still want my kids to enjoy certain parts of my childhood. But holding on too tightly can actually get in the way. When we chase an old feeling, we risk missing the one happening right in front of us.

Trusting that something new can be just as meaningful takes effort. It takes patience instead of comparison. As I sit here, I can’t help but wonder what Christmas will look like for my kids’ kids. What things that we see as new and disruptive will be the norm for them and I can’t even begin to imagine what things will be new and disruptive for them. I hope that makes sense?

Public Service Announcement

Also, my birthday is a few days after Christmas. Public service announcement for anyone who loves someone in this situation: we get two gifts. Not one “this is for your birthday and Christmas” combo present. That is not how life or calendars work.

Thank You

If you have these same fears and worries, thank you. Thank you for caring enough to even question it. Thank you for wanting your kids to feel joy the holidays in this unnecessarily complicated world. Merry Christmas!