Adulthood Feels Fast AF

So last week I started writing this blog about our past vacation but was rudely interrupted by my daughter deciding to verbally duel me. It was a brutal legendary battle but we're cool now. 

I know this is not a new thought, but lately I've noticed a lot that people have stopped just appreciating life and and instead manage it like content. Every good thing now feels like it needs documentation and proof. Family dinner? Take a picture. Vacation sunset? Better record it. Kids laughing together? Hold on, let me grab my phone first before they start fighting again like little maniacs.

What’s ironic is it's not even for ourselves most of the time. We just naturally think this would make a good post. It is honestly kind of odd when you think about it. Then later everyone sits around saying the exact same shit:

“Man, that went by so fast.” Well no shit. Of course it did.

We spent half the damn time trying to capture it instead of actually being in it. That realization hit me hard recently because I started thinking about this past week alone. I genuinely cannot remember if I sat still and fully appreciated where I was. Not one time and I know my life is good. That’s kind of depressing honestly.

Life Seems like a Checklist

I don’t know if it’s always been this way but adulthood is basically one giant ass optimization project. Every moment has to lead somewhere. Even relaxing somehow became stressful.

Vacations are basically military operations. We spend months planning the perfect trip, researching restaurants, creating itineraries, comparing hotels, plus trying to coordinate everyone’s schedules like we are preparing for an invasion. Then we finally get there and instead of enjoying ourselves, we spend half the trip worried about whether everyone else is enjoying themselves.

Instead of enjoying the vacation, people spend half the trip managing it. Parents especially are constantly checking whether everyone else is having enough fun.

“Are the kids bored?” “Should we be doing more?” “Why did we spend $200 just to end up eating pizza again?”

And because vacations are expensive, there is like a pressure to maximize every second of it. Every day becomes packed so that everybody can be making magical lifelong memories nonstop. Then suddenly the trip is over and everyone says the exact same thing: “Man, that went by way too fast.”

Red Dead Redemption 2

One thing I love about video games is they remind you to slow down and appreciate the world around you.

Take Red Dead Redemption 2 for example. That game practically begs you to slow down. The world is massive, beautiful, detailed, plus full of little moments that have nothing to do with the main game. You can literally spend hours fishing, camping, riding your horse through the woods, or just existing in the environment. Seriously, look it up right now. The game's scenery is amazing.

My dumbass played as quickly as possible because I wanted to see the end of the story. Once I beat the game I had to go back and watch YouYube videos to see the parts of the world I rushed through. Sound familiar?

That is basically adulthood now.

With kids, I am starting to see life does not disappear in dramatic moments. It disappears quietly during boring routines. One day your kid asks you to play outside for the hundredth time and you are too busy. One day your kids stop asking you to watch them do every random annoying thing possible. And you do not notice those moments disappearing because at the time they just feel normal. That’s what is scary to me.

We Keep Chasing

I think a huge reason people feel stuck or even disappointed all the time is because we convince ourselves we’ll be happier in the future. I am sure you have all said one of these things:

“I’ll relax after this project.” 

“I’ll enjoy life more once we move.”

“I’ll be happier when I lose weight.”

“I’ll feel successful once I make more money.”

To be honest this blog is kind of short so I am using lists to make it look a bit longer lol.

Even when we get the thing we wanted, we just start chasing something else. We are unbelievably bad at appreciating where we currently are. And look, I am not saying ambition is bad. Goals are not bad. I am just saying we are too good at missing our own lives while trying to improve them.

We Never Get This Time Back

As we get older we struggle with this a lot. It sucks realizing time is not moving slower anymore. It speeds the fuck up every year. Remember as a kid, summers felt forever. Now you blink once and Costco already has Halloween decorations out again. It’s terrifying honestly.

A minute ago my kids were tiny and needed to be carried everywhere. Out of nowhere they have opinions, attitudes, favorite music, plus the ability to emotionally destroy you with one sentence from the backseat.

We need to do a better job remembering life is happening right now. 

1985

I do not think the answer is throwing your phone into the ocean and living like it is prehistoric times which is anytime before 1985. Sorry whoever is older than me just took a stray lol. 

I like technology. I like posting online. Hell, this entire blog exists because I enjoy connecting with people through this shit. But I do think we need to stop acting like documenting life is the same thing as experiencing it. I am writing this as someone who still struggles with it.

Thanks for reading. If you haven’t checked out the other blogs yet, go take a look and subscribe so you don’t miss future posts. You can always reach me at savepointdad@gmail.com or find me on Instagram at @SavePointDad.